Thursday, January 31, 2008

很残忍

我真的很残忍。
一次又一次地把他推到地狱里。
为什么我那么想不开?
那么久的事我还耿耿于怀。
难道一个人做错就不能有回改的机会吗?
应该要怎样做才能原谅他?
我不知道不知道。
那时好好的为什么要搞那么多事?
虽说是注定,但能改变的。
为什么举手之劳的事我做不到?
我对他太不公平了。
但这不能怪我。
我的自卫太强了。
任何伤害到我的机会我都不会让它成功。
我真的一直都没有后悔我当初做得决定。
只是,为什么事情好像还存在着?

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

躲在被窝里交换心事

要怎样才能正确表达心理所想的?
第一次觉得开放式的部落格不好。
有时我也会不希望不应该看的人看我的文章。
有很多问题想问,却不知道应该问谁。
有很多心事想说,却不知道应该跟谁说。
根本就没有适合的对象。
而我也不习惯跟人家诉说心事。
要找一个真心又可以诉说心事的人,很难的。
很久没有躲在被窝里交换心事的那种朋友了。

残忍

我会不会太残忍了?

Monday, January 28, 2008

anti-fur

i read jeslyn blog about animal fur that skinned alive few days before... i was wonder how was it at first and today i read her forward email about that post. it was about fur farms in China and the way they get the animals skin. many animals were still alive when they skinning their skin. they were hit and step by the workers.

can you imagine yourselves skin was being peal off while you are still alive and feeling the pain???

i can't imagine how can the workers did their job. aren't they have any feelings? any little feeling toward the helpless animals... especially dogs. we always say that dog is human best friend. how can they do this to dogs just because of their small amount of fur. torture them, beat them, kick and step on their head! yeah! your eyes don't have any problem. the workers STEP on their HEAD!

luckily i am not fur-lover. i can't imagine what i wearing when i see what happened to all that animals. animals fur is for them to protect themselves. and now because of human... yes, HUMAN! tend to go on luxuries, look elegant, show off how rich you are........

we should let them see how they get their expensive-elegant-luxuries-look and how the animals suffer because of their act. unbelievable!!!

REMEMBER!!! NO DEMAND NO SUPPLY!!!



Pledge to go fur-free at PETA.org

*this is the most cruel thing that i ever seen. even thought i always watch horror movie and torture-kind movie, but this is still the most ever cruel thing that i watch. i didn't even have the urge to watch finish it. it was to cruel and imagine it happened to you. just as jeslyn said: you already can feel the pain when you accidentally cut your finger with knife. can you imagine how the animals feel... please and please put your situation in them.

When the fur is finally peeled off over the animals' heads, their naked, bloody bodies are thrown onto a pile of those who have gone before them. Some are still alive, breathing in ragged gasps and blinking slowly. Some of the animals' hearts are still beating five to 10 minutes after they are skinned. One investigator recorded a skinned raccoon dog on the heap of carcasses who had enough strength to lift his bloodied head and stare into the camera.

click here to know more!

remember human!! ANTI-FUR!!!

生日密码

在朋友的部落格那里看到“生日密码”这个东西。
真的有那么准吗?
真是叫人难以置信!
我觉得那里对我生日日期的解说非常准确,要不相信都难,
因为它真的是说得太准了!


9月7日
追求成功的人


9月7日出生的人一辈子为了追求成功所付努力与心血,简直可以写成一部励志小说,换句话说,他们在一生中将遭受许多困难与挫折。通常,[成功]是条漫长的路,他们所面对的与将十足的多样化并充满冒险性。但是,除非已经达到当初想要追求的目标,否则这些充满决心的人是永远也不会放弃的,就算是要付出临终最后一口气的代价,他们也绝不会松手。

这个世界并不能很快地了解或含意到这些人,但是,赁着他们的意志力与深具开创性的观念,出生于这一天的人终能赢得众人的认可。然而,令人不解的是,9月7 日出生的人可以在自己的领域中轻易爬到最高的位置,甚至在相当年轻的时候就能功成名就;可是一旦成功了,他们却会失去了奋斗的目标。因此,有些人会在这时 放弃已拥有有的一切,让自己[归零],从另一个领域重新出发,迈向另一个目标,当然,这种行为会令家人和朋友感到相当错愕并难以接受。

令出生于9月7日的人萦绕于心的,并不是成功本身,而奋力去达成目标的过程。他们拥有一颗一意向前冲的心,好让他们可以遵循自己的计划,赢过竞争者、死对头或毁谤者。今天出生的人不会是令人感到愉快的敌人,因为他们歼灭对手的心意是非常强烈与坚定,一旦下定决心要拼出胜负时,也不会有所谓的妇人之仁。但是在另一方面,他们却是绝佳的盟友和朋友,至少对那些与他们站在相同利益的同一阵线人士而言是如此,此时就必须要求他们忠于某些共同目标或原则。

当9月7日出生的人人事科技或高度专业化的工作时,除他们已经完全掌握该领域的相关要素,否则绝不会半途而废。他们对自己的工作会表现出绝大的忠诚,如果 他们是领导或管理的人,更会将团体的目标、属下或工作人员紧紧地凝聚在一起,成为一个动作很顺利的单位,也不会质疑真正的老板是谁或工作目标是什么等问 题。出生于今天的人通常会成为家中的主脑人物,他们会给小孩与配偶一些方向或为他们打气,却绝不宽容不服从的行为。然而,当他们的孩子到了青春期时,真正的问题也就发生了。矛盾的是,虽然他们会训练子女、要求子女们要独立自主且为自己设想,但他们自己却十分缺乏这方面的技巧,无法处理一些因此而产生的难以避免的摩擦。

如果他们能更冷静一点、学会和别人一起分担责任,或者更加融入团队的话,必能更加成功。越是不关心控制权上的得失问题,他们自己以及他们所属的团队就越能 得到工作上的成功。出生于这一天的人会随着年纪增长而更加成熟,但有些人会因此而失去竞争力。也许,对他们来说最理想的生活,就是在人生的最后几年才得到 期望中的成功。可是,如果他们感到自己的梦想已被安排妥当,甚至从不了解自己的梦想是什么,反而会活在平静的心情中。

幸运数字和守护星
9月7日出生的人会受到数字7和海王量的影响。海王星统治了视野、梦想和心理现象,所以,出生于今天的人也会受到这些不稳定因素的影响。和水星(处妇女座的主宰行星)的特质给合在一起之后,个人倾向于官能主义,因此,9月7日出生的人必须留意周围一些不是很健全的心理或神秘的活动。一般说来,受数字7影响的人比较喜欢变化与旅行,这些能为9月7日出生的人带来兴奋与满足感。

健康
出生于这一天的人必须按时身体健康检查,因为他们很容易忽略自己的健康问题。一般而言,9月7日出生的人对于食物都有一种很敏锐的品味,所以,假若能越早 学习料理的话,助益将越大。运动,对出生于这一天的人而言并不是第一顺位的考时不时,但是团队运动的挑战,倒是能为他们的体能找到一个良好的宣泄管道。9 月7日出生的人相当注重官能享受,所以他们会要求比较活跃的性生活,好保持身心的快乐。

建议
接受你内心的一切。在生活中并不一定时常要拿着予刺风车,学着让自己快乐,然后再将快乐的礼物送给别人。对自己和周遭的人不要太过苛求,严苛不妥协的态度会种下反叛的种子。

名 人
  • 伊丽莎白女王(Queen Elizabeth I)16世纪英国专制君主,从一开始,伊丽莎白便广受人民爱戴。这位具有纯正英国皇室血统、个性平民化的君主,令英国成为世界上首屈一指的强权国家。
  • 美国名摇滚歌星巴第哈利(Buddy Holly),也是歌曲作词者,是摇滚音乐中的传奇人物,后于飞机意外事故中不幸丧生。
  • 心脏科医生狄见贝基(Michael DeBakey),首次移植人工心脏进入体内,帮助血液的推进。
  • 美国高尔夫名将桑吉丝(Louise Suggs)。  
  • 索尼罗林(Sonny Rollins)美国爵士次中音萨克斯风演奏者,同时也是作曲家与乐团指挥。他在现代爵士乐界扮演指导者角色,对后辈影响很大,最拿手的是以波普爵士乐为基调的大场面即兴演奏。
  • 美国舞台及电影导演伊来亚卡赞(Elia Kazan),曾获两届奥斯卡金像奖及许多戏剧奖,成名作为《岸上风云》与《天伦梦觉》。

塔罗牌
大秘仪塔罗牌的第7张是[战车],牌面上的胜利者以一种强而有力的姿态,展现他在人世间的丰功伟业。这张牌可以解释成:不论正道多么艰险难行,你都得继续走下去。牌面正立时,代表成功、有才能和有效率匹克跳牌面倒立时,则暗示专制的态度和拙劣的方面感。

静思语
每件事都会发生两次。

优点
勤勉向上、目标取向、有决心。

缺点
太富于竞争心、不敏感、不宽容。





p/s:原来伊丽莎白女王也是这一天出生的!哈哈!

Friday, January 25, 2008

friends forever

i abandoned my blog few days again. tomorrow is saturday and i don't need to work...

something i need to blog today... something that touched me and make my heart melt.

today just as usual i went to work this morning and then came back in the evening. my mom work night shift today and my sis went to tuition. i teach my bro study as he will be having monthly test next week. around 9.30pm my mom came back and she saw there is a letter on the tv table... she is the one who always check there as she always receive letters and bills.

then she took up a blue letter and i didn't notice at all as i sit facing back to her. my bro suddenly day that is my letter. i am quite surprise as i didn't thought of anyone will send me letter. i didn't try to guess is from anyone. i open that letter and found out it was a chinese new year greeting card and there is a letter inside. i open the card first to find out who send me the greeting card.

out of my expectation...it was peyyein. hahaha...
i didn't thought she will send me cards and letter. that day when we chatted online she says i can email her or phone her or even write letter if i want. but now she is the one who wrote it to me. and the chinese new year card she made out of herself... she draw it and decorate it and even create a poem for me!! it is sooo touching. i didn't thought someone will welling to make a card or even send me a card. usually only i am the one who doing all this sending card and making card. haha...

now i really can feel what's the feeling when someone did card and send to you. some more is do it themselves... that also mean that is the only card that ever appear on earth. nobody and no one will also get the same card as mine... doesn't it sound special? very very special!



Friends for life is what we are
Trough thick and thin you were my friend
Leaning on you, you gave me endless support
The strength to get up and go again...

If my heart were shattered, you'd heal it
If my heart were happy, we both rejoiced in it...

You were my best friends
Always and forever
It's been good
The best friendship ever
Never end, now and forever...

~this is the poem peyyein wrote to me!~



to peyyein:
what you wrote to me also is what i want to tell you...
i really appreciate our friendship and you as my friend.
not normal friend but best friend.
although we didn't meet for 2 years plus and when we meet last week... we were just like last time.
nothing ever change and we like don't have gap at all.
not like others of my friend... even we meet quite some times but we still feel a gap.
luckily we still like last time in our class... fooling around...
times flies and hope that your relationship will always remain the same.
i will still say the same old thing.
you can find me whenever you want...
tell me whatever you like...
i am very very proud and willing to be the one who know how to make you laugh and finish your sentences before you did so...
i am really lucky...
i feel very lucky to have a friend like you.
this si what i am searching for and i failed many many times.
but even though i failed many times but i still believe there are real friendship in this world.
and now i met one. i will really keep it in my heart forever and ever and plus a day.
i don't have such a talent like you to create poem for you.
or be romantic giving surprise for you.
i only have simple words and sentences that make you understand right after your read it.
always remember that there will be someone standing right beside you when you need her.



the letter peyyein wrote to me!


the hand-made chinese new year card.


message on the card.


everything from peyyein and is all hand-made....include the envelope.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

幼教

昨天是上班的第一天,一切都顺顺利利的。
那些小孩是那么地天真无邪。
很庆幸的是,很多的小孩都很喜欢我。
也许小孩都喜欢比较新的东西。
我第一天上班,他们当然觉得好奇,个个都抢着要我教。
有的还直接连老师也不要叫我,反而叫我姐姐。
哈哈哈。还真的蛮开心的。
当幼教好像一点压力也没有。
我不需要准备什么教材,因为都已经准备好了。
每天早上他们到学校时,要给他们念手卡,还有读“Peter and Jane”。
由于我负责的是年龄较小的那一班,三至五岁的,所以比较轻松吧!
五岁的一班,还有六岁的一班,都分开来上课。
念完手卡变让全部的学生唱歌。
因为新年快到了,当然是教他们唱新年歌。
那些一面唱歌,一面表演的小孩是多么地可爱。
过后,个年龄的学生就到各自的班上课。
三到五岁的就到学校范围玩耍,我只是看着他们玩耍,不要让他们打架。
然后就带到课室上课,教教他们简单的字,写写彩彩的。
一点时,那些读半天的学生就回家,大约有一半的人是读半天的。
另外的那一半就吃午餐、冲凉、做功课等,过后就去睡午觉。
从两点睡到四点。那段时间我要做什么都可以。看书啊,聊天啊都可以。
比我想象的还要好很多。
他们给我一个月薪金700令吉。
虽然在很多人的眼里700可是少之又少,根本就不够他们花。
但是700一个月却比我预料的还要多,我原本还以为一个月可能就600而已。
这都是市场的价钱啊!
而且午餐也可以在那里享用,那一餐就可以剩下了不少,我只须要付我的车油费。
而且还不止一餐。早上十点一次算是早餐吧,然后午餐,过后四点时还有茶点。
真的是比我想象中好上几十倍。

今天有一位老师缺席,负责人Ms. Lai要我带五岁的那一班。
我竟然可以那么有耐心,不知道是吃错什么药了。呵呵!
面对一群的小孩,我可以一个一个慢慢教。
我还被他们欺负。
我是新人,他们当然觉得好欺负啦!
而且到目前为止我都还没发脾气。
我看到那么一群的小孩,根本就发不了什么脾气嘛!
有一个小孩更可爱。
星期一早上他来时嘴里就一直挂着:我明天不要来了。
可是到中午时,我问他来学校好不好玩?他竟然回答我好玩。
我再问他明天要不要来?他竟然跟我说要,脸上还挂着微笑。
今天早上他是带着开开心心的心情来上课。
还说明天还想来上学。
我觉得是我让他觉得来上课很好玩。哈哈!
小孩子就是这样,总是吃软不吃硬。

说真的看到这些小孩这么小就来上学,好像失去了童年。
以前我五岁才上幼儿园,现在的孩子两岁就送来幼儿园了,真是说不出的感伤啊!
每一餐不管你喜欢还是不喜欢那道食物,你都得吃下去。
还好那里的小孩都不是很偏食的。
有菜的食物也吃,不会像一般小孩那样偏食。
哪像以前的我啊,我可是在这两年才学会真正的吃菜。
现在我才会觉得青菜是好吃的。

Saturday, January 19, 2008

happy belated birthday

i totally forget about yesterday was jay's birthday.
can't believe i can totally forget about it.
as he is my beloved 'husband'.
what happened to me?? i can forget jay's birthday.
what i remember yesterday was the date.
i keep on remember it was 18th and keep on replay in my mind.
but the second after 18th only i realize it was jzy's birthday as i was reading jeslyn blog.
she post about jay's birthday and his concert.
i still not yet buy his concert ticket...
how if his ticket sold off at last??
depends la... see how later.
i didn't go to kl lately how to buy?
wish jay happy belated birthday! although he won't saw this post... huhu

life

i will post in english in this post...
not really what i want because i like to write in chinese more....
i have no choice... i reformat my laptop again and this time i don't know what cause my laptop to hang and lag so seriously. the shop just reformat it and i have to pay RM50 to reformat only.
they didn't install chinese input for me some more. make me very very frustrated.
earn my RM50 and didn't install chinese input for me. really no use.
my friend call me to take to shop and call them to input for me. but it is so much trouble, i need to pay for the parking and my petrol and don't know they will charge me any service charge or not.
i am thinking of learn to reformat myself....if can...
then i won't spend so much and more easy for me. i can put whatever i want.
no more trouble and no more complain.

went to interview for a job yesterday.
a small kindergarten at malim.
just want to fill my time in this long long holidays.
really don't know what to do and i already grow with mushroom and fungus although i just stay at home for around 10 days.
didn't thought i can get the job so fast.
they want me to start work from next monday.
i think will not be a difficult job for me.
playing and teaching with kids. kinda fun...
i not very sure with the pay as i didn't really ask about it.
at first the organiser want to pay me per day then i ask weather they pay by month.
if pay by day is RM30 per day.
working hour is from 7.45am to 5.30 pm. is quite a long time but much more better then working in supermarket which have to stand and serve customer whole day.
she asked me what is my expectation about the pay.
surely i very clever and won't answer like i expected thousand per month.
i just say around RM600-800.
she very happy with my answer and say very reasonable.
feel very proud of myself... hahaha
maybe she will see my performance. if i perform very good then i will get higher pay.
better don't have high expectation about the pay.
i just want to fill my time and my holidays.
and i shouldn't be so materialistic.

went out with pey yein and christine today.
i spent around 1 hour to find pey yein house. she really stay in jungle. haha...
she stay at batu berendam and i really don't know that place at all as i seldom go there.
i solute myself just base one what peyyein told me on phone this morning and i can reach until there. hahahaha... really very happy i can find my own way. even got a few times i turn into the wrong junction. but i still manage to go back the right direction.
after that we go to christine house to fetch her and together we go to mp.
yeah..mp again. we walked and walked and talk until we round whole mp. then we cross over the road and go to megamall.
there we round and round again. didn't really shop as i don't have the feeling to shop.
met a lot of people working part time after stpm.
met doreen which i didn't like at all. totally don't like. she is still the same old her. still so irritating and causing people to dislike her.
then we went back to mp to had lunch in pizza hut. sit there eat and talk.
after that i send them back home. and i manage to stop by and visit peyyein house.
although know her for quite some times but i didn't went to her house before.
this is the first time i ever step into her house.
she has a very lovely garden full with flowers, ponds with fishes and even fruits and vegetable. hahaha... very lovely home.

today really make me remember back a lot our old time in secondary school.
very happy and friendly.
although we didn't meet for a very long time, more then 2 years, but we are still the same we were. still as funny and friend as before.
like nothing ever change.
time fly and passed so fast.
didn't even realize we already didn't meet for 2 years.
hopefully our friendship will not stop.

Friday, January 11, 2008

陈颖见

竟然有人不知道谁是陈颖见。
跟我同辈而不知道。
头上突然加了三条线刷下来的模样。-_-!!!
当时陈颖见因为“熬夜”这首歌而红片大马。
大多数在当时的中小学生都听过那首歌吧!



熬夜


手信



陈颖见档案
名字: 陈颖见
英文名: Zyan
生日: 25/05/83
星座: 双子
身高: 174
体重: 62
出生地: KL
爱好: 凡能爱的我都好
最喜欢的颜色: 绿最
喜欢的食物: 太多了,因为很喜欢吃
最喜欢的装扮: 看那天的feel
最喜欢的地方: 可以听歌的地方
最满意的身体部位: 耳朵里的听小骨,因为让我可以听歌
最大的愿望: 开心就好
座右铭: 及时行乐
你怎么形容自己: 音乐探险家



发表作品
2001 〈听见〉全创作专辑
2003 〈看见〉留学札记
2006 〈手信〉单曲
2006-2007 MY FM 〈音乐探险家〉节目主持


词曲作品
伊 能静 好好的过 (词)
合唱 手圈手一起走/AEC 台歌 (词曲)
合唱 音乐盛放
/MY FM 台歌 (曲)
合唱 最强声势/ASTRO 新秀大赛十周年主题曲 (曲)

合 唱 准备好了吗?/学海"我讲华语,我考华文"主题曲 (词曲)
曾 国辉 陌生公路 (词曲)
黄 俊源 I'll be Good (词曲)



资料来源:口袋音乐pocket music

Thursday, January 10, 2008

看见陈颖见

终于把陈颖见的《看见陈颖见》读完了。
原本可以在对短短几小时就看完的书,我竟用上一个晚上 + 一个早上的时间看完它。
我很仔细的读着,慢慢消化书里的文字,记下陈颖见听过的歌、喜欢的歌。
读着读着也钩起了我很多很多的回忆。
回听陈颖见的歌,会有不一样的味道。
他在书中记载了很多有关他留学时的点滴。
很多他的第一次、不习惯之处、离乡背井到外国深造的悲伤、对家人亲戚朋友的思念、自己面对孤独等,感觉很相似。
原来大多数的青少年都会经历相识的经验。
原来并没什么好矛盾的。
每个人都会成长,一路上会有阻碍。看我们怎么去面对。
书里面有一封陈爸爸给陈颖见的一封信,里面写着:

“求学如生活,求知与求识,是一条辨别与摸索真理的过程,哪有那么一帆风顺,不经挫折,不经挑战,哪知道自己的能耐有多大?”




每次阅读时都习惯性的在桌上摆放着纸和笔。



总爱记下别人听过的歌,看过的书。



这是陈颖见的书《看见陈颖见》。



简单不过,绿绿的封面。





虽书附送的两张postcard。



陈颖见的亲笔签名。





“准备好了吗”EP



陈颖见的首张个人专辑--听见。



陈颖见个人网站--看见 No Scrutini.ZN.g。虽然已经荒废很久,但是他有时还会回复留言。

准备好了吗?

原来我快要二十岁了啊!
后知后觉才发现到,原来在2008年的9月我就会变成二十岁了。
也许是2字开始吧,竟有莫名的恐惧感。
那么快我就要20岁了。时间仿佛过得越来越快。
20岁原来是这个样子的。
记得小时候,不算小,应该说3、4年前,总觉得20岁离我很远。当时认识20岁的朋友会觉得他们好大啊!不是外形的大,而是大哥哥、大姐姐的大。
原来我快像他们了。也许在别的小孩的眼中,他们也会觉得我是个大姐姐。也默默地希望长大后会像我。
生日刚过不久,我竟然忘了最后一次的生日我是19岁的。
来临的生日我就20岁了。
看起来听起来,莫名的恐惧又来了。

今天翻开我的抽屉,发现几年前买的书。
我竟然回想不到我曾买过《看见陈颖见》这本书,想了很久终于让我想到那是在很久以前在他的聚会中买的。
我怎么可以忘了呢?原来时间过得真快,好像很久年前的事。那只不过是我在初中二或三买的。
我读回书中的内容,是陈颖见记载他在澳洲深造的生活。感触特别多。
他写那些生活点滴的时候也正好是20岁。
20岁的他做了的事,而20岁的我做了什么?

要20岁了,应该值得高兴的吧!
却又好像失去了什么,迷惑了、恐惧了。
之前十年的“青少年时期”过得不够,应该更精彩的不是吗?
为什么那么快就要踏入2字头了呢?
我还没为自己踏入2字头的岁月做准备啊!
近几年总是跌跌撞撞的,经历了很多也看了很多。
要是20岁了,就不再是青少年而是少年了。
没有理由让我再任性了。
更要对自己所做的一切决定而负责。
面对的选择题会越来越多。
要是选对了,就顺顺利利的。
要是选错了,就自己承担一切。
我做好这一切的准备了吗?
我准备好了吗?
我……准备好了吗?


p/s:原来陈颖见今年也25岁了。时间……过得好快好快。

Monday, January 7, 2008

money troublesome

To those who don’t know, I’m back in Malacca since last Thursday, 3rd of this month, right after my examination. I flew back to Malacca. I seldom online when I am at home and I didn’t blog or chat online. My laptop started to have problems. I’m not sure it was hack by virus or my hard disc is having problem. Still checking it by myself, since yesterday till now. Hopefully I can fix the problem and don’t need take it to shop to reformat or anything.

Went to met Vicky on Friday. She was only free on that day and we met last minute. She says she is busy on Saturday and Sunday. So no choice, we meet on Friday as we really didn’t meet for a long long time. We went for dinner and talk about a lot thing. She left one and a half year to graduate and I still have 5 more years to go… omg… I can’t imagine that. When she already working and earn few thousand a month and I still studying and memorizing all the stuff that I need to. Am I regret what I’m choosing now… most of my friend will starst to work 2 years later… how about mt??

Get to know Jay will having his concert at merdeka stadium. Woahahaha… I am high and uncontrollable. Ticket is purchasable just few day before and half of the most expensive ticket already sold off. I just can’t imagine it. Thought that nobody will like to purchase the most expensive ticket as I always saw the highest price ticket can’t sold off even few days before the concert and now…. Jay’s concert!! The first row already sold off… I am soooooooo speechless. I thought I can get the front-est sit but now…… lost hope. I am at Malacca and can’t go to mid valley galaxy counter to buy his ticket. I don’t have credit card to purchase online. I can’t call my dad or mom to open cheque as I didn’t want them to know I am going to jay’s concert. How good if I got credit card? How good if I can open cheque… hahaha… I am night-dreaming……. And I don’t save money… all my money is in my bank and how can I take it out… without knowledge of my mom and dad. Haha… I am bad… really really bad. And I get to know my sis have saving in her cupboard and it is a large amount… hehehe… having bad ideas now… but I know she will borrow me if I ask…

Jeslyn is leaving me and going to genting tomorrow… so damn sad… regretted now. She ask me one month before as she has to order ticket but I can’t give her comfirm answer so I say I won’t go. If I know…is tomorrow then I will go. Damn bored man… just 3 or 4th day of holiday and I started to fell lost… I can’t be too free and nothing to do. If not I will be lost. Trying to find part-time job and my mom don’t want me to work in some supermarket or some store… why I can’t… the pay there is much higher then else where. What I want now is more money… as if I don’t have enough money. My aim for the part time job is at least 1000 one month. It’s quite high I know… but that’s my aim. My mom want me to work in day care center which the pay is low and have to work office hour. Only 550 per month. Really very few… not even enough for my petrol and my meal…. I think too much I know… work 9 hour plus a day and only get 550? I better work in shops in supermarket and can earn by hour or roughly 1000 ++ even I work 9 hour a day. It’s double means it is a big big different.

What should I choose now?? Feeling going to burst. So many things… look like just small small things to others I think but for me it’s like making a life decision. How to buy jay’s ticket??? I really really eager, dying, desperate-ing to go to his concert. I waited and waited and hope for a long long time. I don’t want to miss this time. And don’t know when will he be having concert for the next time. And his most-expensive-front-sit-ticket is selling fast… I must grab it as fast as possible… omg… please help me my god.

I want go holiday! I want go Jay’s concert! I want part-time job! I want a lot a lot more!!!
And everything need money money money money money and moneyyyyyyy.
My eyes will have only $$$$$$$$$$$$$$. Hahahaha……

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

过去的让它过去

2008年是处女座全盘调整,朝向目标的一年。

希望真的是如此
2007年的我
不知道在搞什么
好像得罪每个人
好像做什么事都是错
好像做什么都不顺利
好像什么都针对我而来

2008年
我希望的事过得顺顺利利
把去年的不愉快全部忘记

去年跌得重重的
今年从新爬起来
继续走下去

去年变成碎块的信心
今年从新捡起来
一片片粘回去

去年失去的一切
今年全部要回来
不让它被抢去

2008年将会很美好
我会把它变得多姿多彩
历史不会再重演
发生过的事我不会再让它发生

从过去的失败变成成功
从过去的不愉快变成愉快
从过去的悲伤变成快乐
从过去的失去变成拥有

我得从过去得到教训
不会再回到过去
过去的让它过去

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

舍得放手

原来我不曾出现在你生命里
都是因为天气的错
都是因为咖啡的错
都是因为音乐的错
竟然让我想起你
我想你已经忘了我
我也选择沉默

为什么生活那么苦
就应该经历那么多风风雨雨
我一直一直往前走
每当回头就想到你的冷漠
我对你来说就是那么不值得吗
你没有理由的不理我
发生了什么是我也不懂

算了累了
问再多也是多余的
过去就让它过去吧
毕竟我再也受不了这种打击
原来友情那么不可靠
原来没有什么是值得信任的



看清自己的脆弱
和你的软弱
历经这段感情之后
我才了解另一个我
终于舍得去成全去放手
过我自己的生活
偶尔想你的时候
就让回忆来陪我
终于舍得去成全去放手
不追问你的感受
尊重彼此的选择
当你决定了向左
我往前走

郑秀文-舍得